


I Wanna Take You (to a Gay Bar)

by shirasade



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Demisexual Alec Lightwood, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Gay Bar, Implied childhood trauma, Jealousy, M/M, POV Alec Lightwood, Parabatai, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-08
Updated: 2020-09-08
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:55:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26355322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shirasade/pseuds/shirasade
Summary: "Umm, Jace, what kind of club is this?" Alec looked around apprehensively, a sinking feeling in his stomach. He couldn't see the Circle member they'd followed here, but hecouldsee a mass of writhing bodies, most of them male, rubbing against one another to the deafening beat of pumping music.
Relationships: Alec Lightwood/Jace Wayland
Comments: 5
Kudos: 79





	I Wanna Take You (to a Gay Bar)

**Author's Note:**

> Look what I found pretty much finished in my (massive) WIP folder! Just dusted it off a little and hope you'll enjoy. ;)
> 
> Silly title from Electric Six's _Gay Bar_.

"Umm, Jace, what kind of club is this?" Alec looked around apprehensively, a sinking feeling in his stomach. He couldn't see the Circle member they'd followed here, but he _could_ see a mass of writhing bodies, most of them male, rubbing against one another to the deafening beat of pumping music.

Exchanging a quick glance, they pocketed their steles. It was always difficult to be glamored in crowds without being noticed. And for once Jace's and Alec's black leather attire didn't attract any attention - or rather, the only eyes that watched them were doing so with naked, unashamed hunger instead of suspicion or bemusement.

"That really should be obvious, Alec, even you can’t be _that_ innnocent." Alec could feel his cheeks heat up, but Jace didn't seem fazed, a playful smirk on his lips, eyes searching the crowd mock-casually. "Now, can you see our _friend_? Because I lost him, damn it."

Shaking himself, Alec forced his mind back to their mission, scouring their surroundings with the help of his Voyance rune. Unfortunately he didn’t have any more luck than his parabatai, and they shared a resigned glance.

“Well, he’s definitely still inside, so we’ll just have to stake out the door - why don’t you stay here while I go to the bar, get us some drinks to blend in and make sure that there’s no back exit,” Jace suggested, and although there were few things Alec wanted less than spend more time in these surroundings, he had to admit it was a good plan.

Still, he felt the need to put up at least a formal protest. “How about you stay and I’ll scope out the back. I’ve got a better vantage point.”

“You sure?” Jace’s grin was much too wide for Alec’s comfort, and he knew his parabatai was holding something back. Alec narrowed his eyes at him, and he relented with an exaggerated shrug, “Hey, I’m just trying to protect your virtue, considering what goes on in the backrooms of these places.”

“That’s not necessary,” Alec fronted and quickly went on the offensive, “And how would you know anyway?”

“I have my ways,” Jace chuckled and disappeared into the crowd with a pat to Alec’s shoulder, leaving Alec to stand there, trying his best not to stick out like a sore thumb. He suspected that he didn’t succeed any better in that than in suppressing the memory of Jace’s touch. He should be used to it by now, so he blamed it on the men so shamelessly giving in to desires Alec had only ever dreamed of. Also, his mind was stuck on Jace’s implication that he’d seen - or even experienced - what went on in the backrooms.

The thought alone was enough for Alec’s jeans to become considerably tighter, and he fidgeted in place, simultaneously feeling both uncomfortably aroused and unaccountably betrayed by his parabatai keeping such a thing secret. Not that Alec had any right to cast stones, considering he’d agreed to become Jace’s parabatai when he’d already been aware of his own feelings - although maybe he wouldn’t have, if he’d thought that there was any chance of those feelings being reciprocated.

Which they obviously weren’t, even if Jace was into guys and hadn’t just experimented once or twice, and it was all theoretical anyway, since there was no world in which Alec could imagine himself not being Jace’s parabatai. Their bond was too important, their souls too entwined, as Alec reminded himself by pressing a palm to the rune hidden underneath his black shirt. Still, he’d be glad to leave this place with its many reminders of what he couldn’t have.

Despite his distraction, Alec didn’t look away from the entrance, making sure they could catch their quarry and get out of here. He was so focused on his task that he almost jumped in surprise when a hand landed quite firmly on his ass. It wasn’t Jace, obviously, because Alec would have felt his approach, but the guy Alec discovered smiling coyly up at himself had similarly blonde hair, although his built was slimmer and his eyes were just a regular shade of grey-blue.

“Whoa, that’s quite a grip you’ve got there,” the guy yelled over the din of the music, making Alec realize he’d instinctively grabbed the hand that had so startled him. Lucky that he hadn’t broken the guy’s wrist or drawn his blade! Loosening his fingers, he dropped the offending limb as if he’d been burned and mumbled and apology, which was waved away airily. “Don’t worry about it, I shouldn’t have touched you without permission. I’m Tim, by the way.”

“Alec,” Alec replied automatically, only to wish he hadn’t, because while the guy - Tim - seemed nice enough, he most definitely didn’t want to encourage him. Although he couldn’t help but feel flattered by the blatant approval with which Tim’s eyes were roaming over his body, the attention made him squirm. “Umm, I’m sorry, but I don’t…”

He trailed off, unsure how to continue, only for Tim to smile understandingly. “This your first time here, Alec? Because I’m sure I’d remember you.”

It was a cliche thing to say, and Tim was still standing a bit too close for Alec’s comfort. To his chagrin, however, he felt himself blush, because apparently he could easily face a horde of demons but one flirtatious smile and he turned into an awkward mundane. Clearing his throat, he leaned down a bit so he wouldn’t have to shout as he fumbled for an explanation, “No, I… I’m here with a friend.”

“Just a friend?” Tim asked archly, licking his lips, a gesture that Alec could hardly miss from this close. “If he’s more, he really shouldn’t leave you like this. I know I sure wouldn’t let you out of my sight…”

“Just… just a friend.” Alec wasn’t quite sure what made him reply instead of telling Tim to fuck off. He told himself he simply didn’t want to make a scene, and that he could easily keep an eye on the door while indulging in this harmless chat - something that felt simultaneously exhilarating and terrifying. Who knew when he’d get a chance like this again, because he certainly wasn’t going to start visiting clubs on his own. He allowed himself an apologetic smile, hoping it didn’t show how nervous he was. “We probably have to leave soon, though.”

“Can I buy you a drink at least?” Tim inquired, apparently undaunted if the hand now resting on Alec’s arm was anything to go by.

Alec swallowed but didn’t move away, and for a moment he allowed himself to imagine what it would be like to accept, to see where this might lead. Even as he thought it, however, he knew it to be folly. He simply wasn’t built that way, didn’t see the point in random hook-ups the way Jace seemed to so easily. Now, for example, he could see that Tim was attractive and charming, yet a casual smile from Jace could set Alec’s heart racing in ways Tim’s most overt attentiveness never would.

However, before he could extricate himself, a familiar arm was slung over his shoulder, and Jace inquired with a pointed look at Tim, “Who’s your friend?”

Despite having felt his parabatai approach, Alec stiffened, confused by the way Jace was pressed against his side, almost as if he was shielding Alec from Tim. Which was ridiculous, and Alec moved away slightly, explaining in an unimpressed tone, “This is Tim.”

“Hi Tim, I’m Jace.” Undaunted, Jace remained stuck to Alec like a determined limpet, while Tim’s eyebrows were threatening to disappear under his blonde fringe as he nodded awkwardly and backed away. Although he’d planned to end the encounter himself, Alec glared at his parabatai, who grinned up at him in a way that set a flutter of butterflies loose in Alec’s stomach, even before Jace said with exaggerated friendliness, “Thanks for keeping Alec company.”

“Uh, yeah, sure, no problem.” Unsurprisingly, Tim left with one last look at Alec, who shrugged in silent apology, but didn’t move away from Jace. As always, he felt caught in his parabatai’s orbit, unable - or rather, unwilling - to break free, although he was utterly baffled by what could only be called a show of possessiveness, possibly even jealousy.

Usually, Alec would try to rationalize this behavior away, yet this proved impossible with Jace remaining plastered to his side, his eyes unreadable and fixed on Alec’s face, making him all too aware how close they were standing. Alec was dimly aware that he’d long stopped keeping watch on the exit, but when he managed to form words it was only to whisper hoarsely, “What was that about?”

A part of him still expected Jace to pull back, play it off the way he’d always done when they’d found themselves in situations that made Alec’s heart race with hope. This time, though, Jace stayed where he was, frozen except for the bopping of his adam’s apple. Then his tongue flicked out to wet his lips, a movement Alec tracked helplessly, swaying forward - and then, almost before Alec realized it, they were kissing.

It was fierce and hungry, almost violent, and Alec’s blood rushed downwards, leaving him embarrassingly hard in what felt like seconds. His hands reached around Jace, pulling him against himself with such force, it knocked the breath out of him. This effectively broke the kiss, and they panted into each other’s mouths. In the flickering lights of the club, Jace’s eyes were dark, and so was his voice. “Fuck, Alec… I know I should be sorry, but I’m not.”

“You’re… not?” Some semblance of reason returned to Alec, yet he couldn’t bring himself to let go of his parabatai, who in turn remained pressed against him, his hands resting on Alec’s shoulders. As much as Alec wanted to throw caution to the wind and resume the exploration of the tension he could feel vibrating between them, Jace’s hardness he felt pressed against his own, he needed to know one thing first: “But why now, Jace? You must know I’ve wanted this forever.”

Because, as Alec now realized, Jace had to have been aware of Alec’s feelings, and he’d chosen not to pursue them. Jace dropped his eyes and his hands, visibly shrinking in on himself, and Alec’s burst of hurt indignation melted away like snow in the sun. Of course there hadn’t been any maliciousness in his Jace’s actions - he might be thoughtless sometimes, but Alec knew better than anyone how much his parabatai put everyone else’s well-being before his own. Especially when it came to Alec.

“I didn’t want to taint you.” When Jace spoke, it was so softly, Alec had to lean down to understand him, his heart clenching painfully in response, even before Jac continued wretchedly, “I’d already been selfish enough to make you my parabatai, anything else felt… too _dangerous_. I was so sure that you’d see me for what I am if I gave in, and then I’d lose you completely.”

He wrenched his gaze up, and the fear on his face was so plain, Alec almost flinched back, catching himself just in time. Instead he forced himself to hold Jace’s pain-filled eyes and raised his hands in order to cup his parabatai’s face in his palms. Jace’s entire body was tense like a bowstring, and Alec put every ounce of sincerity he could muster into his assurance: “You will never lose me. Not ever. Even if you decide that this was it, that we should never speak of that kiss again, you will never get rid of me, parabatai.”

“Oh, Alec," Jace breathed, relaxing from one second to the next. "I really should have known better, shouldn't I?”

A hiccupping little laugh escaped Jace, and Alec simply had to kiss him, pouring everything he was feeling into the desperate slide of his lips over Jace’s. Heartbreak for Jace’s deep-seated insecurity, rage because he knew the reasons for it, and most of all love, so much love, and want, and _need_. Everything he’d been suppressing for so long just came flooding out, so strongly he was pretty sure his parabatai could feel it through their bond, just as he could feel the moment Jace lowered his guard and gave himself over to their kiss.

It was overwhelming, and they both stumbled slightly, groaning into each other’s mouths when electricity seemed to crackle between them. Alec was still cradling Jace’s face, and Jace had wrapped his fingers around his wrists, as if he was afraid Alec would let go, although this was the last thing on Alec’s mind right now.

They were pressed together, and somewhere someone yelled, “Get a room!”, which normally would have mortified Alec. When he’d dared to dream of his first kiss, it most certainly hadn’t been kissing his parabatai in public, among mundanes, but right now the only thing he could feel was Jace’s body against his, all hard muscles and the beginnings of a rather impressive erection, which mirrored Alec’s own. Once Jace pulled away a few inches, Alec found himself mindlessly chasing his mouth, only to be stopped by Jace offering him his hand and suggesting with a wink, “Come on, I know a place.”

Not stopping to think, Alec nodded and took Jace’s hand, a thrill running through him when their fingers slotted together as if it they'd done this a million times before. Jace squeezed back, shooting him a smile that told Alec that his parabatai shared his sentiments, and then Alec was being pulled through the crowds, towards the back that Jace had scoped out earlier.

“Shit,” Alec exclaimed in dismay, coming to a sudden halt. Jace’s face immediately fell, and Alec quickly shook his head reassuringly. “No, not _us_ \- the Circle member. I’m sure he’s gotten away by now.”

He wasn’t really surprised when Jace burst out laughing. “Always the responsible one… Please don't ever change, Alec!” Raising himself on his tiptoes, Jace cupped Alec’s face in both hands, eyes dancing. “However, I _might_ have accidentally stabbed the guy during my reconnaissance.”

“Accidentally, huh?” Alec tried to keep a straight face but failed. He wrapped his arms around Jace and pulled him close. “And you didn’t think it worth mentioning until now.”

“I planned to, but then I got… distracted,” Jace replied defensively, and from this close Alec could clearly see him starting to blush, even in the flickering strobe lights. “You were standing there with this guy all over you, and I just… I just _reacted_.”

After that, Alec simply had to kiss him again, feeling lightheaded with the knowledge that he could. Everything else forgotten, he coaxed Jace’s mouth open, heat beginning to coil in his stomach when their tongues slid against each other, warm and slick and entirely addictive. From one moment to the next Alec was once more achingly, desperately hard, and he ground against his parabatai, not surprised in the least to find him in a similar state.

If he focused, Alec could have sworn he felt Jace’s arousal through their bond, echoing and intensifying his own growing passion, but focusing became almost impossible as their bodies attempted to meld together. Someone ran into them, grumbling loudly about “fucking exhibitionists, get a room,” yet instead of being embarrassed, all Alec could think was that a room sounded perfect right about now.

“C’mon, parabatai, we were on our way someplace a bit more private.” As if he’d read his mind, Jace slid his hands down Alec’s arms. Entangling their fingers again, he took a step back, his smile so blinding that Alec’s breath caught. He’d seen Jace with lovers before, but he’d never looked at any of them this way, and Alec swore to himself that he’d make Jace smile like this for the rest of their lives, sappy as that was.

But then, he’d already bound his soul to this beautiful, gifted, _fragile_ warrior, so everything else was easy. Laughing giddily, Alec reeled Jace in, pressing a fond kiss to the bow of that sunrise smile. His words were a promise, the meaning of which he knew Jace would understand: “Lead and I’ll follow, parabatai.”


End file.
